A Schisty Move

I realize I told ya'll that I'd post if something big broke, but I am still in shock with the douchebaggery that the Blue Jays pulled around Turkey Day. I only call it douchebaggery because it severely hindered the Red Sox off season plans, but in reality it was a brilliant move that will maximize the amount of return they will get in their shortstop search. When the Jays signed Alex Gonzalez (and his .299 OBP) it left us with only one viable option. That unfortunate option is one much-maligned Marco Scutaro. Now with the adversity of having to sign an aging shortstop, we are going to have to give up two draft picks, provided the Blue Jays offer him arbitration. So as they say let's "put another quarter in the merry-go-round" in the revolving shortstop door, and let's now lose two draft picks as well. Just to be clear are only other SS options are: Khalil (baseball makes me cry because I'm mentally weak) Greene, Orlando ( I slept with Keith Foulke's wife) Cabrera, and the oft injured Bobby Crosby.

Once again, this is my blog, and I reserve the right to print retractions at any time. As much as Clay Buchholz aggravates me, the only way we get rid of him is for a YOUNG pitcher. While Doc may have an IMPRESSIVE resume, work ethic, and preparation habits, here's some numbers that may pique your interest. Basically what this is saying is that, the only pitcher AFTER the age of 32 that has thrown as many innings/pitches as he has and had any improvement on the stats over his next 4 years is Bob Gibson. And while Doc Halladay could very well be a first ballot hall of famer, he doesn't dominate a game with sheer power like Gibson did, and when a pitcher that relies on movement and deception of pitches more so than power, if any of that starts to depreciate you could be in for a decline in goods. I'm not going to bet against him AT ALL for being the outlier that goes against all the numbers and performs well into his late 30's, but the numbers say that it will be a steep hill to climb.

Now who would I be if I didn't offer an alternative to get bolster this staff. As good as Clay Buchholz is, he's not the face of this franchise going forward but the Marlins are a team that likes to get the most out of their cost efficient players and then trade them to either boost their farm system or acquire more "cheap" players until their value went up. But I have the solution much like I always do. It's Josh Johnson. The Marlins, said that they won't trade him but they can't sign him to an extension for some reason, and what better person to replace Beckett than a reincarnation of Commander Kick Ass himself. If you call up Florida and tell them we'll give you Buchholz as a top tier uncostly pitching prospect, Casey Kotchman as a cheap major league experienced first baseman (they'll want him with the departure of Nick Johnson) plus two double-A players one pitcher one position player probably including Josh Reddick.

And in an attempt at an assassination ( how's that for alliteration?) my friends over at Sweaty Towels decided to fire off a warning shot in my small town's Alumni Basketball game by throwing an errant pass and with my vertical leaping ability ( you could almost slide a credit card underneath the bottom of my feet)I came back down only to hear a pop, and feel shit crunch around inside my knee. Well your valiant attempt to take over the blogosphere was thwarted and better luck next time. My ACL may be tore up but my spirit can't be broken… (…winces in pain…well played sir.)

Stay Tuned

Ryan

Hal-y Shit

With another Nostradamus moment seemingly within the Red Sox grasp, they are "pulling out all the stops" for Roy Halladay. I couldn't agree more that this move is the RIGHT move. For all of you saying that Clay Buchholz is "the future" I say in your general direction, that you're an asshat, and Jon Lester is our future. Clay as I have stated NUMEROUS times is only 7 months younger than our beloved, Adonis Jon Lester, and he has shown NOTHING that Jon Lester hasn't already done. Ability to pitch in big games? Check (The verdict is still out in my mind on Buchholz). Thrown a no hitter? Been there, done that, bought the T-shirt. And being a lefty? Oops only Jonny takes the cake there. Simply put: He's expendable (if/and only if you get a pitcher in return).

Halladay has said he will not re-sign in Toronto, he is almost to the point of demanding a trade, and he has made public that the Red Sox are one of a handful of teams he would waive his full no-trade clause for. He is notoriously known for his pre game preparations, between starts regimen and off-season workouts; so staying healthy won't be a problem even though he will turn 33 in May of 2010. You could have one of the 3^rd (Lincecum, Hernandez are 1-2) best right handed pitcher on your staff, AND the best lefty in the American League. (Only reason he doesn't get the Major Leagues, is because Cliff Lee would probably shit down my throat, just for not giving him the edge.) Also, to the Yankee fans, Lester takes the cake over CC because of age, contract, and overall non-douchebaggery (see: "I'm not in it for the money"). And to put it bluntly if Josh Beckett is your number 3 starter, you are well positioned to have the best starting staff ERA in all of baseball.

For all of my dedicated followers, I will return (unless something huge breaks) Monday because of the Turkey-induced coma that will be crashing down on my head VERY soon. The abundance of Rum in my system in the next 24 hours as well could potentially have bearing on the aforementioned coma, but I digress. Here's hoping that Thanksgiving will once again bring us MANY JOYS (Remember Curt Schilling? Josh Beckett?) Yup, Thanksgiving trades. I'm thankful for all the readers' that love the idiocy that I seem to spit out on a daily basis and here's to more of the same after the hiatus.

Stay Tuned

Ryan

Mauer, Miggy, and J-Bay

Was it even a question that Joe Mauer would win the AL MVP? I guess it was for that Seattle Reporter who voted for Miguel Cabrera just for the sake of going against the grain. Don't get me wrong, Cabrera's season was by all accounts very good. But no one is honestly going to tell me that he meant more to the Tigers, than Joe Mauer did to the Twins. The Twins would have finished below .500 without him and not even come close to that pivotal 163^rd game, he won an unprecedented 3^rd batting title as a catcher for crying outloud. For all of you simpletons that believe shortstop is the most difficult on the diamond, this backstop is telling you to fist yourself. It is the most physically demanding position on the diamond and to have the stamina and fervor that he shows day in and day out is in itself an MVP worthy task. This guy is hands down the best all around player in the American League. He won a Gold Glove this year, and deservedly so, yes that was a dig at Derek Jeter. It's not going to be good for baseball if he leaves the Twin Cities, but if he were to hit the Open Market, does anyone else doubt he would get more money thrown at him than Alex Rodriguez?

Speaking of Miguel Cabrera, he is now one of the latest, Motor City starting nine to be put on the block. And although Ken Rosenthal seems to think you can get him for remnants left over on the pan from cooking spaghetti, the Red Sox could obtain him for most likely less than what it would take to obtain Adrian Gonzalez. But with his .300 average, 30 dingers, and 100 ribs, you're getting an albatross for a contract for the next 5 years and you're getting an alcohol problem that Lindsay Lohan might gawk at, and the question of playing in a big market. His alcoholism would most likely be the reason that he has a problem in the big market, if something got out that he "Chris Brown'd" his wife again, he may completely go in the shitter, but AA is always a helpful tool. Papelbon could DEFINITELY be the starting point in this trade, but the prospects are a little thin at the upper level minors and I'm doubting the Tigers want kids that are 3-4 years away in a trade for one of the top 10 hitters in baseball.

One reporter thinks that the Blue Jays could be the dark horse for the services of Jason bay for the next 4-5 years. He's a Canada native, has always said he'd like to play his home games there, and let's face it they are going to need someone to soften the impact of losing Roy Halladay this offseason. This to me makes all the sense in the world, but hearing that the Dodgers and Angels could be in on the Halladay sweepstakes is dismaying. They have talent at the top levels of their system ready for Major league ball or within a year of reaching the "Big Club" and I'm not sure that the Red Sox can match an offer from either of those two teams with regards to league ready talent.

Stay Tuned

Ryan

Being a Savant Strikes Again.

Like another one of those piss-poor reruns of Saved by the Bell: The College Years, I was on again! One of the steps of my foolproof plan for a successful offseason has come to fruition. The Red Sox are actively shopping Mike Lowell. Actively, to me, would be calling around and fielding offers from all of the teams in Major League Baseball. But the Red Sox have basically put a Shaquille O'Neal sized boot in Mike Lowell's ass and showed him the door by telling all interested teams that they will eat HALF of his contract which makes a 12 mil annual salary an affordable and more palatable 6 mil/ year.

A few of the teams that could take him on would be:

• The World Series runner up's Philadelphia Phillies. After parting ways with Pedro Feliz, they need a new 3^rd baseman. They had interest in Mike Lowell when he previously hit the free agent market. Adding another "Major League" bat would also be a huge upgrade, from the pothole that was his spot in the order. If I were to take bets on where Mike would end up, I'm going to go with the Phillies, for a B level prospect with SOME upside.
  
• If the Giants want to keep Tim Lincecum from testing the free agent waters when his current contract is up, they need to sign offense, and they need to sign it fast. Mike Lowell could very well be a bargain and a VERY productive player in their lineup and the Giants REALLY need to move their uber slugger, ultra hefty 3^rd baseman Pablo Sandoval to first base. They (Giants) should be a player in the Lowell sweepstakes.
  
• Because Oakland is the place where washed up, has been players go to roost for affordable contracts (See Jason Giambi and Nomar Garciaparra) and Eric Chavez has had career H1N1 for the better part of 5 years now. Have to give them the time of day also.
  

Thus far all reports are saying that the Red Sox have targeted 4 Scott Boras clients. While this may prove to be a VERY costly winter having Bernie Madoff for an agent, the players that they are targeting (Matt Holliday, Adrian Beltre, Rick Ankiel, and Mike Gonzalez) are almost precisely what the doctor ordered. I say almost because why the hell are we signing Rick Ankiel? I mean don't get me wrong, I love great playoff performing pitchers, oh it's for ANOTHER left handed hitting backup outfielder, Why? Unless this is just another asinine Ken Rosenthal rumor (remember that Papelbon and Lowell for Cabrera speculation? Ugh) then someone else is getting flipped in a deal.

All the rest of the assumed targets are exceptional talents and would be a godsend to this geriatric ship we are starting to float on. It will be interesting to see who takes on the Tin Man, but you can assume that the rest of my plan will come to a head before the start of the 2010 season against the World Champion New York Yankees.

Stay Tuned

Marco Scutar-NO

It has been brought to my attention that I am not very high on Marco Scutaro. So I figured I'd give you the reasons for it instead of my blatant disregard for anything factual and just slander someone's baseball character, just because he looks like a slightly pudgy version of Scott Baio.(Told ya.) Let's delve, shall we?

Let's get this positive stuff out of the way. Marco Scutaro had a banner year. EVERY offensive category for him improved year over year. His fielding has NEVER been an issue, and he's VERY versatile.

That being said, he's too old. He just turned 34 and investing ANYTHING more than a one year deal with him could potentially be suicide. I say this knowing full well that there are 3 shortstops that are HEAD AND SHOULDERS better than him in next year's free-agent pool (Reyes, Rollins, Peralta). I sort of view his offensive year as an anomaly. Most players have 1-3 (most players 1) great years where everything they do turns to gold.

A list of Firsts (or Seconds)for Scutaro-

• First time to hit double digit home runs in a season.
  
• First time he had EVER broken 60 walks (shattered that with 90)
  
• First time to have an OBP over .350 (.379) (his career OBP is .337)
  
• He has only batted above .270 twice in his career.
  
• The most stolen bases EVER in a single year. (14)
  
• The most hits (162)
  
• The first time ever scoring 100 runs.
  
• Highest ever fielding % when spending the most time at SS.
  

All of these seem like great accolades but to me it seems like a peak, and I don't want to be the recipient of the precipitous downfall. Everyone knows that unless you are one of the elite, inner-circle Hall of Famers; once you hit 35 you're career is essentially over and you are no longer the force you once were.

Basically what I'm getting at without running the risk of being discriminatory is that he's too goddamn old. UNLESS, you ONLY bring him here for a year and then let him walk. You might as well sign Gonzalez for 3 mil a year. Being that he's been acclimated to Boston, he's 2 years younger, and his glove is just as good if not better than Scutaro's. Marco (Polo) to me looks like a one hit wonder sort of like that all girl group Blaque (not that I'm calling anything they did remotely a hit *starts sweating nervously*)

So, everyone needs to calm down because he's a one trick pony (defense only). The next logical question you're probably asking yourself is, "How does this little wise ass know this?" Consistency and longevity, my friends. Has he done anything that he did last season before? Nope. He could be a late bloomer, but you'll find that I am going to be 100% correct that after this first year with whatever team he signs with he is going to regress back to the guy that left Oakland and New York all those years ago. I'm just sayin…

Stay Tuned

Ryan

Time To Pine

I have come across some interesting stats in the last couple of hours and as usual it got me thinking. The Red Sox are one of the handfuls of teams that for the most part have deep pockets when it comes to baseball operations. Take a look at the payroll over the last few years:

year payroll

2001 110,035,883
2002 108,366,060
2003 99,946,500
2004 127,298,500
2005 123,505,125
2006 120,099,824
2007 143,026,214
2008 133,390,035
2009 121,745,999

As you probably know baseball is a sport of streaks, peaks, and valleys. I may run the risk of being "Captain Obvious" when I now tell you that the years immediately before their pennant and World Series winning runs that their payroll declined. I could be completely off-base but the every 3^rd year skyrocket in payroll doesn't look like a coincidence. The REAL question is however, what will they do knowing that this free-agent market is less than stellar? I've got some suggestions (Duh).

1^st order of business-SIGN MATT HOLLIDAY

I'm not sure that Matt Holliday's brief stint in Oakland is a detractor that Theo would weigh heavily upon when given the decision to go after Matt Holliday. That ballpark is an abysmal place for a hitter. It's disgustingly huge, the ball doesn't carry, and he was hitting in a lineup with No protection (Sorry Jason Giambi). He is a career .318 hitter, the power numbers could have been skewed up in the Rocky Mountain Air, but you can't skew putting the bat on the ball. He doesn't strike out as much, statistically is a MUCH better all around hitter AND outfielder (crotch shot jokes aside). He's going to look for 6 years but if we can get him for 5 at around 18 mil per year I say do it to it! Jason Bay has been an admirable addition to the Red Sox, but the prospect of seeing him patrol the outfield when he's 35 is about as scary as watching Susan Boyle undress. He strikes out too much and although he may hit a few more home runs Holliday is THE most complete player in this year's market, despite what Bay's agent tells you.

2^nd order of business- Trade for Roy Halladay

After publicly lambasting one of my devoted readers (Yes this one's for you Bradley) I really think that Halladay is the pitcher we need to obtain in the offseason. The new GM has said that he will grant an extension window if the pot is sweetened a bit, and to me that's money in the bank. This is the ONLY way that you deal Buchholz, is if you get pitching in return. Halladay is a bona fide stud and if Lincecum and Hernandez weren't in the league he'd be the best right handed pitcher in the Bigs' as well. Hernandez would be GREAT but he is going to command too much right now. He'll hit the market in a few years and we'll broach that subject at a later date. The other reason you NEED to trade for Roy Halladay is because if the OTHER team (Bronx Bomba's) no one will beat them for the next 5 years, unless everyone breaks their femur or has to suffer through Hope Floats. He gives us the pitching edge, unless the Yankees can trade for Greinke or Hernandez, and he historically pitches VERY well (9-2, 2.51ERA since 2007) against them as well.

3^rd order of business-Dump/Trade Mike Lowell

Theo has said that he wants to get better on defense and his road/home splits, and the Tin Man (Poor attempt at a squeaky Mike Lowell joke) is most likely the main proponent of that statement. You WILL eat some salary, unless he goes as part of a trade as a thrown in, and even then you'll still have to pony up some dough. At the time his new contract looked sort of like a discount, but do you want to pay a broken down 3^rd baseman that count get to a ball more than 3 feet to either side of him 12.5 mil? Didn't think so. Mike Lowell cannot be part of the 2010 Red Sox if you want to go deep into the playoffs, unless you are of the mind that he and Ortiz can platoon at DH (Picture me laughing and pointing at you, about to ridicule you mercilessly).

4^th order of business- Find a 3-bagger

Whether it is Adrian Beltre (sans testicle) or Chone Figgins, you need to have an upgrade from the aforementioned Mike Lowell. Both have UZR ratings above 14 and are dynamic in their own right at the plate. Beltre is OBVIOUSLY the "bigger" bat being that he will pop a few more homers out of the park, and Chone Figgins is the more patient, speedy, "run .300" type of hitter. I'm leaning towards Beltre partly because if we signed Figgins there is no place to put him in the lineup with Ellsbury at the top, Pedroia pigeonholed in the 2-spot, and seemingly Alex Gonzalez inhabiting the 9-slot(more to come). Beltre would hit EXACTLY where Lowell was in the lineup and be the younger and most likely more powerful version of Mike Lowell that we desperately need.

5^th order of business- Re-sign Alex Gonzalez to a 1 year deal for 3 mil

You sign him as ONE MORE stop gap in the shortstop barrage that we have seen over the years. You won't get much from him at the plate (lifetime .294 OBP, *dies a little inside*) but what you're looking for is defense. Defense and pitching win championships and that's what you're looking to go after. There are 0 free agents that will give you the defense that Gonzalez gives you since Jack Wilson just re-signed with the Mariners. But in the 2011 shortstop free Agent class, there are the likes of Jimmy Rollins, Jose Reyes, and Johnny Peralta just to name a few. You've waited 6 years since we had a reliable SS (Nomar still counts) and what's one more if we can get a marquis player next year.

After these things are done if you want to burn Manny DelCarmen or find some way to get a couple more arms in the 'pen that's fine with me but the pressing issues in that order, are what need to be taken into not just consideration but action.

Stay Tuned

Ryan

One Liner Wednesday

• Joe Girardi's biography has already been made, I Am Sam.
  
• I wasn't an A-Rod fan before, but I now have pure hatred since he let Kate Hudson waste an hour and twenty-nine minutes of my life in Bride Wars.
  
• Looks like one of the lefties I wanted for the bullpen (Mike Gonzalez) is now represented by Scott Boras, I hardly knew ye.
  
• Blue Jays GM says he will "let teams talk extension with Halladay, if they sweeten the pot." He'll be gone before 2010.
  
• Greinke wins the Cy Young. As if there was ANY other logical choice?
  
• The team that potentially trades for Edwin Jackson, is going to get the shit end of the stick.
  
• Pedro, Dejame en paz, por favor.
  
• The Nat's have made it known that they want to sign John Lackey. I'm making it known, he isn't going there.
  
• Is there any coincidence with regards to Tim Lincecum that the NL Cy Young is announced at 4:20?
  
• The Indians have dealt away TWO Cy Young award winners, they won't win 70 games this year, when do they deal Sizemore?
  
• Marco Scutaro is NOT a viable option at short, so STFU.
  
• If Ben Sheets or any other GOOD reclamation project (Harden?) signs with the Red Sox, Buchholz is gone in a blockbuster.
  
• Mike Lowell needs to be moved REGARDLESS of obtaining a bopper. *Chone Figgins sniggers*
  
• Joe Girardi, still a flame bag.
  
• The Mets are destined for greatness if they signed 2 pitchers (Lackey and Vicente Padilla) and Nick Johnson.
  
• If the Rays trade BJ Upton OR Carl Crawford they stand NO CHANCE of competing in the AL East.
  
• If the Orioles can learn to pitch they will shock the world.
  
• Jon Lester will win the Cy Young in 2010.

We’re Getting Old My Friends

The only thing of real interest to me over the last 24 hours was something that Ken Rosenthal said. He seems to believe that one, Miguel Cabrera, could be made available by the Tigers, even though their owner has said the opposite. He then went onto say that the Red Sox should offer a package to them of Jonathan Papelbon, Mike Lowell, Lars Anderson and then a B level pitching prospect. This to me would be a phenomenal trade (for the Red Sox only), but With Mike Lowell making 12 mil, Papelbon making 6.25 in '09 (presumably going up in 2010), and Cabrera making 18 mil/year, it doesn't seem like the Tigers would be getting the Salary relief they are coveting unless a wad of cash goes with it. C'mon Ken, come at me with something a little more substantial…you're better than that.

So I do what every sane person does with their life when there's no baseball on, on Monday nights, and the spouse forgets to DVR House: Watch Monday Night Raw. Now to be honest I haven't watched wrestling in going on (looks at watch) say about 8 years. But the last time I watched it seemed to be infused with muscle-head, cock-diesel, athletes whom were so steroid infused that their sweat was actually synthetic Winstrol seeping from their pores. I turned it on (and by turned it on I mean I couldn't find the remote when I walked into the bedroom so it stayed on that channel) and it was the last match of the night which was a triple tag-team (and yes as gay as it sounds it was worse to watch) between Chris Jericho and The Big Show, John Cena and The Undertaker, and Triple-H and Shawn Michaels.

All huge names, big popular wrestler's right? Well then why did it look like everyone but John Cena and Triple-H had gotten hit with a Mack Truck full of Time and Obesity. The Big Show honest to god used to have muscles, if you don't believe that watch Jingle All the Way, he's the 7 foot Santa that tries to cold cock Arnold Schwarzenegger, but last night he looked more like Butterbean than a professional wrestler. Chris Jericho went from being an Adonis, to a slightly more buff version of Owen Wilson. Shawn Michaels was a mullet wielding wrecking crew and now he is only comparable to Billy Ray Cyrus circa 1992. The Undertaker, simply stated, looked like a white Manute Bol.

The final question I have, is does anyone know what the hell John Cena is doing when he waves at himself? I have to say it looks idiotic but I'll tell you I'm one to jump on a bandwagon if it gets your point across. Going forward I think waving at myself may get my point across a little more efficiently. He's sort of the poster boy for the wrestling world, and as long as he doesn't continue to pursue his rap career, I'm okay with him.

Stay Tuned

Ryan

There’s No Such Thing as Too Much Air Guitar

When the re-signing of the pseudo-catcher Ramon Hernandez by the Reds is the top baseball story, you know it's going to be a rough day/weekend. That, coupled with the sack tapping that Bill Belichick inflicted upon me last night made for a Sunday night best forgotten. So I'm not going to bore you with off the wall predictions, or spot on assessments of why Joe Girardi looks like a hornpout, I'm going to entertain you with what I was doing during the alpha-game of the year thus far.

It doesn't get much better than having a couple buddies over, watching the game, and kickin' back some suds. And like every guy does when they get together, we were bouncing off idiotic jokes and euphemisms off of each other like a pinball machine. So you can almost be certain that at the point when the Air Guitar came out that the night was an utter success. I was attempting to re-enact the Rocky theme (you know the….da da danana danana danana…yeah that one). So I was making the trumpet noise with my mouth and then I irrationally started to bring up the air guitar and then when the "strings" come in for the background slammed down a piano as if my inner-Alicia Keys was coming out.

This was all well and fine, until it was brought to my attention that the need for a guitar was null and void considering that the concerto is a boldface Jazz Trumpet, and the "strings" that I brought out was in fact a rather large Tuba. So, not only was my rather impressive attempt at conducting the Trans Siberian Orchestra thwarted, I now have everyone laughing at me because I looked like an imbecile so I decided the best thing to do was say, "There's No Such Thing as Too Much Air Guitar."

It was a simple mistake really. And I'm sure all of you will agree that you play the Air Guitar not just frequently when you watch Sly's training montages, but also during every song that could potentially have the need for "Air Instrumentals".

With regards, to "The Decision" that Bill Belichick made in last night's uber-FML-Fest, he erred, bottom line. He got scared of the prospect of Peyton Manning having the ball with 2 minutes left no matter where on the field, after reliving the 2006 AFC Championship Game in his head he said, "Go Fuck a Goat Peyton, I'm winning this with Tom." Now I don't know how I would feel if I were Jerod Mayo or Vince Wilfork right now. If my coach has no confidence in my ability in stopping someone who will most likely be pinned back somewhere around there 20-30 yard line, with 2 minutes left to go, I'm not going to be a happy camper. We had the game in our sights, and Bill muffed. The only other things that are coming to mind are that Tom Brady was otherworldly last night, and if Laurence "I clearly have a vag" Maroney touches the ball again for the Patriots, I will probably punch a puppy.

Stay Tuned

Ryan

All’s Quiet on the Western Front.

There isn't much more than speculation from ANY team, but hey I'mma come at you with speculation like shit through a tin horn. (I wish I could take credit for that phrase but that has to go to the grandfather-in-law.)

The Pirates have made their catcher Ryan Doumit available. This may seem like nothing but worthless baseball fodder out of Steel Town, but this guy is one year removed from hitting .318 and slugging .501. Yes I realize that it has been publicized that Victor is the starter, but if the Red Sox can't land the bopper at 1B it is a distinct possibility that they get a decent catcher (Doumit would qualify) and move Victor to 1^st. By limiting the number of innings he spends in his squat the more productive he'll be in October.

The Tigers are trying to shed payroll like Paris Hilton does thongs, and their latest victim is Curtis Granderson. I know what you're thinking. "F'n right doggy, Curtis Granderson." Well maybe you weren't thinking so much like Steve Stiffler, but you need to simmer down on the Granderson situation. He is by all accounts a great teammate, community influence, and defensive mastermind. But, his struggles against left-handed pitchers are worse than Jason Varitek's total package decline. A .183 avg against the likes of Sabathia, Pettite, Romero, and Price and that's just in the AL East, that's not going to cut it. Also, his OBP was 30 points lower than Jacoby Ellsbury's, and we ALL KNOW about the guff you were giving him for getting on base.

That's about it on the front burner but, how about a few Apropos of Nothing:

• Is there any logical reason for Jim Thome, Ken Griffey Jr., or Omar Vizquel to play baseball anymore?
  
• If the Red Sox were to sign John Lackey does that spell the end of Clay Buchholz or Daisuke Matsuzaka?
  
• Jason Varitek owes an Andre the Giant sized dope slap to Scott Boras for not taking arbitration in 2009.
  
• Maybe the Hall of Fame is out of reach but I realize why Pete rose is smiling.
  
• I'm not sure if Jeter winning the Gold Glove or Erick Aybar/Elvis Andrus getting robbed of one is the bigger travesty.
  
• How the hell does Luis Castillo have any value doing his odd Reginald VelJohnson body double contest?
  
• Baseball's my thing through and through, but anyone that isn't going to watch Brady vs. Manning is a monumental schmuck.
  
• It's Friday the 13^th, the third Friday the 13^th of the year, what does that mean? Beer, Rum, Food, More rum, music, Beiruit, and more rum.
  

Stay Tuned

Ryan

Evil Genius

When Theo Epstein said he was going to get 'creative', I didn't know that secretly he was about to lop his ear off while painting a masterpiece. It has come to my attention that he inquired upon two players that never even crossed my mind: Dan Uggla and Joey Votto. Yes, Dan Uggla has only played 2^nd base in his Major League career. But the Red Sox were interested on the 29-year-old bopper for a cost efficient left field option (5-mil). He played there a very little bit in the minors and since his defense at second base is average at best anyway, why not put him in Left Field, where you don't really need the range of a middle infielder. Joey Votto, completely threw me for a loop. I wouldn't have though he was available, but Cincinnati is trying to cut their payroll and with one of their HIGHLY touted prospects (Yonder Alonso) is ready for the 'Bigs'. While potentially adding quality players it also seems as if they are trying to cut costs. This could prove to be a great strategy for some of the teams, trying to dump their high priced players for some financial freedom.

I realize that Jason Varitek has been the warrior, the stalwart, the insert-any-brazen-sounding-word here for the duration of his tenure in Boston, but I absolutely don't agree with him picking up his option for anything more than a money standpoint. Hell, if they wanted me to sit on the bench for 3 mil a year I'd do it. But I'm not sure that he could really contribute anything more than knowledge to Victor Martinez. His hands are slow getting through the zone, his toe tapping is so fidgety that it resembles that of Michael J. Fox, and his pop-time to 2^nd base is almost as mind numbing as a retard playing in pudding. There is nothing else that he needs to accomplish as a Major League baseball player, and there is nothing that he has to offer physically to this ballclub. Varitek I loved you (circa 2000-2004) but you've got to hang it up, I've never wanted to punch myself in the ball sack so much as when I watch numerous rally killing at bats or watching the metaphorical quarter get put in the merry-go-round every time someone reaches first base. But, he's here; I guess I have to deal.

Something I have yet to tackle here on BOTN is the announcement that Mark McGwire has been named the hitting coach for the St. Louis Cardinals. He is a .263 career hitter but one of the most prolific sluggers in Baseball history, synthetic or not. But something that he is going to have to face head on is being thrust back into the limelight of baseball. He used steroids, he has all but said it, his brother came out and said it, and Jose Canseco has written a book about it. Was it unethical, immoral, and wrong in every sense of the word integrity? Absolutely. But what a lot of people are forgetting is how captivated all of us were, in that summer of '99. I remember playing in an All-Star game under a bridge in Portsmouth, talking with my friends and fellow All-Stars about how we all think he could hit a ball to that bridge. In all accounts he couldn't have being that the bridge was a solid 2 miles away, but the point stands true. No one player has EVER been bigger than the game, but when baseball was failing to enamor most of the kids in the United States, he brought it back from the pits of despair, and put it on the front burner. It hasn't been the same since.

Big Mac was a cultural icon, a perennial good guy, and someone that America felt like they could trust. Let's face it baseball fans, we were hoodwinked, but were we? Was there really any other reason that his neck was the size of an old Buick, or that his Biceps were comparable to Schwarzenegger's. We all subconsciously knew it, but the fairy tale that each home run was representing was mesmerizing us so that it gave us a false sense of reality. But the real issue is what is he to do now? What is he to do after shanghaiing us in front of Congress? He needs to come clean, he needs to hold one press conference, one chance to clear the air. Since he is no longer playing he doesn't need to be cryptic or anything of that nature. There is no need to name names, but he needs to say I stuck myself in the ass with Deca Durabolin every day as a side dish to my 8-Egg omelet, ½ a pigs worth of Bacon, and 6 cows' worth of milk.

If he does it, and does it right, it will NO LONGER be an issue. His job from then on, is to make the St. Louis Cardinals a better hitting ballclub. But this move is not just a marketing move for baseball; it is also a way to self-promote Mark McGwire. Steroids or not, he may deserve a spot in the Hall of Fame, and the only way he does that is by coming clean. If he doesn't get in, then other players implicated by steroids will not get in either. You have a full 6-7 year window where no one will be getting into the Hall of Fame. Maybe you're OK with that, but these are the superstars of my childhood, and in comparison how would you feel if Mickey Mantle didn't get in because he was a lush, or Hank Aaron didn't get in because he was popping 'greenies', or Darryl Strawberry didn't because his track marks were deeper than Monster Truck Tires. OK the last one was a bad example, but my point remains true.

Stay Tuned

Ryan

Speculative Food for Thought

Not a lot going on in Chicago over the last 24 hours, and that's pretty much the way it's probably going to continue. Boras usually doesn't have his clients sign ANYWHERE until Christmas morning (maybe his attempt at Santa Claus?), so if you looking for Holliday, Beltre, or someone of that nature to sign in the next few days I wouldn't hold your breath. There have been a few intriguing developments though.

Jason Varitek has NOT YET exercised his 3 mil player option and has until midnight to do so. If Scott Boras says he can find a starting gig for a year, would Varitek leave the franchise that he has been the General for for more than 10 years? I'm not sure if he does. There are ONLY two suitors that I could see that would want him to start (knowing that he could probably only start 100 games) they are both National League clubs: Nationals and Astros. The Nationals need some sort of guidance for their pitching staff and Varitek could be a MAJOR factor in aiding their growth as young pitchers. The Astros lost their staple in Brad Ausmus behind the plate and it seems to me a good fit with their ball club given that 'Tek has had experience with Roy Oswalt (WBC). This is going to go down to the wire, but he really needs to sit this one out, do all potential base runners against the Red Sox a disservice and retire with dignity.

The Red Sox are almost assuredly going to offer Billy Wagner arbitration, which is the right thing to do I may add, but what they may or may not have been expecting was for him to actually accept arbitration. This has all the makings of erection-inducing implications if the Red Sox have Billy Wagner back on their pitching staff. Here's where my heads at; Worst Case scenario: you just picked up a 2^nd lefty and an unstoppable 7,8,9^th inning combo with Bard and Papelbon. This also could make Papelbon a smidgen more expendable. There are maybe 3 teams in the Major Leagues that don't need Papelbon as their closer, so this could be used as a trade chip to help us land one of the marquis free-agents we covet. If that happens then we have Wagner as an insurance policy if we hand the reigns over to Daniel Bard. But if I'm Billy Wagner, I'm only 15 saves away from 400, yes he would get some opportunities when Bard needs rest, but do you think he'll get 15? Wagner has a decision to make, Championship or Save milestone, because odds are the teams that he signs with aren't going to be of the same clout as the Boston Red Sox.

Outside of the obvious I have compiled a list of people whom I think that the Sox should look at via trade/free agent:

Matt Lindstrom-The Florida Marlins, have already dealt one of their players to the Red Sox this offseason, and if Papelbon goes, he would be ANOTHER fire-baller that would be invaluable out of the bullpen. Lindstrom had problems saving games but having someone throwing 100mph in the 7^th or 8^th inning proved to be pretty vital for the Red Sox in 2009.

JJ Putz- Seems like the run-of-the-mill reclamation project that Theo is infamous for, and he has made it a point to say that if the offer was right that he'd accept a set-up role. The chance to win a World Series sounds like the 'right offer' to me.

Adrian Beltre- I'm of the opinion that Mike Lowell is not going to be part of the 2010 Boston Red Sox and if that's the case than we are going to need either a 1B while sliding Youkilis over to Third, or a 3B in replace of Mikey. He's a power hitter and an average if not above average defender.

Josh Willingham- If we don't sign either Matt Holliday or re-sign Jason Bay, I am completely OK with a platoon involving Jeremy Hermida and Josh Willingham in Left Field. You don't need to be a defensive mastermind to patrol the short porch in Boston and both of the players are young and have not yet hit their peak, for CHEAP.

Jack Wilson- As much of a defensive Whiz-Kid as Alex Gonzalez is, Jack Wilson is better. Pittsburgh signed him to a HORRIBLE contract, and all indications are that he doesn't want to sign an extension in Seattle, he may be a great pickup that will sure up our middle infield, he is also durable to boot.

That's about all I got for you today.

Stay Tuned

Ryan

You Stay Classy, Boston.

Tim Wakefield has been the elder statesman on the Red Sox for years now, and with the knuckler only 18 wins shy of the Red Sox career win record, the Boston brass were extremely classy by giving him a 2 year deal. Wake was a bit weary at first when it wasn't as much guaranteed money, but when you factor in security (years) it is a phenomenal deal and I love that they kept him so that he could obtain that goal. The one thing many people are asking, however, is why did they cut his pay? I will answer this in two ways. If he stays healthy he actually has the incentives to make MORE over the next 2 years at 10 million max, rather than the 4 mil base with no other increase factors. The other reason is that they are trying to save money. Now most of you are probably thinking, "This kid knows nothing, the cash cow that is the Red Sox do NOT need to save money." That's true, and it isn't. With the last few player negotiations that they have lost out on (Mark Teixeira, most notably) the deciding factors has been just a few extra million over the duration of the contract so if we can save a few dollars here (Wakefield) and there (declining Tek and Gonzo's option) then we have the means to put those extra dollars into the contracts of the winter thus far.

With that in mind, I'm starting to believe myself even more that the Red Sox are in for a LARGE splash on the Free Agent market. It makes sense to me that they are freeing up MORE money in order for them to be able to have to take on at least one massive contract without going over the luxury tax cap.

While it may seem like a given that Jason Varitek picks up his player option, am I the only one that thinks that he doesn't want the backup role for a whole season? Unlike players like Brad Ausmus and Jason Kendall he has essentially been with one team his entire career, and been the cornerstone of his position for a decade. Jason Varitek is a prideful man and he isn't stupid. He realizes that his skill set is diminished, and that it won't get better with one more year under his belt. I'm very much on the fence about his return to the Sox as a bench player, and I could see him calling it quits. As my chess instructor used to say, as he dismantled EVERY ONE of my attack pieces with a measly pawn with an unsuspecting en passant; " A Gentleman Would Retire." (Words that still haunt my dreams, mostly because he said it in a James Earl Jones voice.)

As stated in yesterday's post, I said that it would take considerably less to obtain Roy Halladay than it would have at the 2009 trade deadline and now my pipe dreams are starting to come to fruition when Toronto has went on record saying that, "they want 2 draft picks, so top young talent in ANY trade is a must." Halladay also made it a point to say that the Red Sox are one of the teams that he would approve a trade to. This is not the first time he said this and I may even make the inference that he wants to play for Boston. Anyone for a 'Doc' on the Sox, I for one approve.

Sort of like when you say OJ, the first thing you think of is murder, when you mention the Red Sox you almost have to mention what the Yankees front office is doing. From everything that I've seen, they are leaning towards keeping Damon and Matsui. While the Yankees have a habit of retaining ("rewarding" as Damon would call it) with contracts after a job well done, I really think this would be a step back from the business model (think Boston) that they have tried to emulate over the last few years. Damon and Matsui were fantastic Yankees, but you need to fish or cut bait, it's not like its Derek Jeter. Wait who am I kidding? Sign all the DH's you can find and then stick them in the outfield. It has also come to my attention that they are "intrigued" by John Lackey. I knew that they would covet him all along, and his potential acquisition could weigh VERY heavily on the Red Sox landing a legit Ace this offseason so that they could match their Front 3 with New York's.

Stay Tuned

Ryan

Windy City Wishes

With the GM Meetings in Chicago starting this morning, you would be best suited to believe that Theo Epstein is playing a gargantuan game of grab-ass with newly appointed Padres GM Jed Hoyer. I have decided to make the proclamation that Adrian Gonzalez is NO LONGER a potential player but rather a necessity that we obtain him. It's going to take an ass load of players to get him but so be it. And for all of the people saying, "You're an idiot, hold onto prospects." I ask you, For what? What could we POSSIBLY be holding onto potential big leaguers for when we have the ability to snag an impact player just before he goes into his prime? He is an offensive equal to Mark Teixeira in EVERY sense of the word. Maybe even a SLIGHT advantage on offense with no one protecting him or getting on base in front of him, in that anemic San Diego Lineup. However, Mrs. Teixeira is a defensive guru and although Gonzalez is above average Tex is far and away the best first baseman in baseball. Adrian, I want you, I need you, oh baby, oh baby. (ala Julia Stiles)

I have been thinking a lot lately (If you smell the burning from your house, I'm sorry) and back in "And the Hits Just Keep On Comin'" I broached one of my devoted readers' topic of Roy Halladay. I didn't necessarily dismiss the idea but I was quite indifferent about it. Obviously, anyone would love a Roy Halladay on their team but it comes down to; what do they have left for prospects after Gonzo is signed here. I honestly don't know where the Gonzalez trade talks start. But, I don't know that ANYONE except Daniel Bard is off limits as far as prospects go. So Adrian would probably command 2-3 "A-List" prospects and 2 "B-List" prospects. Then what does that leave you? I'm assuming that you start with Clay Buchholz, and throw one "A-B" prospect and a "B-C" prospect. Halladay is great but JP Ricciardi did a very large disservice to Toronto by not trading him at the previous deadline. The acquiring team would only get him for a year now instead of the stretch run last year and then another year. Not to mention he is getting paid 15.7 mil this year. That is a MASSIVE contract and for a team that is trying to rebuild not a contract you want on the books.

You may think that this is "gutting" the Farm, but in reality it's not. We may not be suited to make a blockbuster in-season trade next year, but the real question is would we need to if we get both Halladay AND Gonzalez? We just won 95 games with players that are getting old and in some instances a shell of their former selves. Adding a perennial Cy Young Candidate and a legitimate power threat in the middle of your lineup you have BASICALLY done exactly what the Yankees did the year before. Gonzalez vs. Teixeira is a push, all things consider. What Rotation would you take if the Red Sox went something like Halladay, Lester, Beckett and the Yankees went something like Sabathia, Burnett, (Chamberlain, Harden?, Lackey?) sounds to me like 2 players could make our team just as unbeatable as the vaunted New York Yankees.

There is something that has been puzzling me and it's the negotiations with Jason Bay. Theo Epstein has even gone as far as calling them, "weird". I wouldn't mind if Jason Bay came back, I realize that I have said that I'd rather have Holliday (that still remains true), but I don't see the Red Sox need to go more than 4 years at 60 million. More than 4 years would take him a full year out of his prime, and with a player whom is already below average in left field, do you really want to see Mike Lowell out in left? It won't be as much of a factor at home, but when you go to Oakland or some of the National League parks, you're going to be in for one shitshow after another. This is another reason why I LOVE the Jeremy Hermida signing. If Bay doesn't like 4 years, at 16 mil per year, why not give Jeremy Hermida a shot? Especially if you can obtain Adrian Gonzalez from the San Diego Fathers. What's the worst thing he could do? Jason Varitek? I don't know that even he could hit that poorly, and his double play rate (only 6 in 2009) is one of the lowest in baseball.

Now onto something far, FAR more serious. What in the beard of Zeus did Sammy Sosa do to his face? I realize that pantomiming is popular on TV (ie Nip/Tuck), and that Michael Jackson was a cultural icon. But what you did looks like Shadow's face from Homeward Bound. (See I wasn't lying.) A piece of advice: Washing your face is best achieved without using Clorox.

Stay Tuned

Ryan

The Hot Stove’s a Burnin’

In an attempt to nullify any sort of celebration for the World Championship New York Yank-me's, the Hot Stove has started full force in the last 24 hours. And the Red Sox are clearly not resting on their laurels. While not a blockbuster trade, an absolute conquest with what they gave up to what they got. Jeremy Hermida, a former first round pick, is exactly the value trade that Theo needed to kick off this offseason. We traded Hunter Jones who in my opinion is NOT an American League pitcher. He has an 88 mph fastball and no secondary pitch, therefore no value when you face the Yankees or Rays. Jose Alvarez, (ya I don't know much about him either) was very good in low-A, but when moved to High A had an era over 4.5. Alvarez has more upside, than Jones but all in all a collective steal from the Marlins on a potential stud.

The Red Sox weren't the only ones doing big things since the final pitch of the World Series.

-The Phillies exercised their option on Cliff Lee. If this wasn't the biggest shocker of all time I don't know what is. The only question now is how much the Phil's are going to pay their newfound Ace. Anyone think 4-5 years 75-80 mil? That's what I'm thinking. He should be able to get Burnett money.

-The Angels re-signed Bobby Abreu for 2 years 19mil, with a vesting option based on plate appearances. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that he was the X factor that helped them over the Red Sox hump in the ALDS. He has almost single-handedly taught EVERY player to see more pitches per at bat. With how he was affected by last year's market, he was VERY smart in taking the quick money and is now one less option to come to the Sox in the event that Jason Bay isn't resigned.

-One person I was very high on, who would also have been a non-tender, is JJ Hardy. I thought he would be phenomenal at Fenway Park and his defense is just as good as Gonzalez now (not 2006), but he has since been traded to the Minnesota Bunters for Carlos Gomez. With the emergence of Denard Span and the need for a cost efficient CF for Milwaukee this trade makes sense in all facets. Great baseball trade! But a massive FML for not giving up a minor league pitcher to get him.

-Jermaine Dye has had his option bought out in Chicago and with the colossus that is Alex Rios' contract it's not a big surprise they needed cash flow. He had a down year batting only .250 but it is being said that he is of interest to the Texas Rangers. But that leads me to my next question…what position would he play? DH? Hamilton, Cruz and Murphy are in their OF and at this point are considerably better defensive players…does that mean Bye-Bye-Blalock?

-The Royals traded Mark Teahen for Josh Fields and Chris Getz to the White Sox…He is going to play 3^rd and move rookie phenom Gordon Beckham to 2^nd. Now whom do they have in Right Field? Only outfielders under contract are Quentin, Rios, and that guy that made a great catch for Buehrle's PG. And since the Royals just declined options on Coco Crisp, Miguel Olivo, and Yasuhiko Yabuta looks like they are trying to once again get some fresh faces in there to get Greinke some people that can give him run production and some bullpen members that could protect a lead on the off chance he doesn't go 9.

-And to add to the list of potential suitors for the Red Sox that are shoving my foot in my mouth ever so deep, Brandon Webb had his option exercised by Arizona. Obviously two aces on one team (the other being Haren) is going to make you an INSTANT competitor in the National League West.

So with less than 48 hours gone by since the end of the 2009 season, we have had a glut of wheelings and dealings. Here's hoping that the only person that Theo get's on this team isn't solely Hermida.

Stay Tuned

Ryan

That’s a Wrap.

So the ever so hyped Chronicles of Pedro were about as anticlimactic as a porno starring Della Reese. I realize that Pedro can't throw 90+ anymore but when he wasn't regularly breaking 86 on the gun they were about to take a King Kong Dong right up the tailpipe. Joba Chamberlain pitched VERY effectively (whoa did I just say that?). Then it was all over but the crying, with Mo in the game. Stick a fork in the Phillies, it wasn't their year, but didn't we know this all along?

They spent the most money in the offseason (*slaps self on forehead* duh) because they wanted the championship. And the tired, sour grapes act has just about run its course, okay Sox fans? There is no salary cap. The Yankees did nothing against the rules, and although it may seem unfair that their pockets are bottomless; I can assure that with revenue sharing and all of the other disadvantages that being a juggernaut, big market team has they all even out in the wash. And if the small market teams owners would rather pocket the money instead of spending it to better their ball club (Yes I'm talking to you Pittsburgh), then so be it. They pined for a World Championship and got it. The players went through the same 162 game grueling schedule that EVERYONE else had to deal with, didn't have any significant injuries and performed at an optimum level all year. As much as we hate the Yankees, and boy do I EVER LOATHE Dumbo, I mean Jorge Posada, they still had to play the games.

Now we have reached the offseason. The Red Sox have 15 days to negotiate with Jason Bay, they need to find a middle of the order bat in addition to whomever they sign for left field, and they need to find a way to combat this Yankees stifling team. Right this very second; the Yankees are Matt Holliday and John Lackey away from having an unbeatable team for the next 5 years. Something has to be done about this. Jason Bay is not the answer for the Red Sox in left field, if you want to see a MORE in depth comparison of the two free agents here you go. Let's face it, our team is old. Not only old, but slow and mediocre in many facets of the game. Defense being the foremost issue. Alex Gonzalez has proved to be a stalwart at shortstop but unless he is willing to take a pay cut is there really the need for him? Where's Pokey Reese when you need him?

With Regards to pitching Dave D'onofrio had some interesting things to say. Realistically what we need is not Felix Hernandez, unless we get him at a cheap price (like Buchholz and Bowden straight up) but I don't think that's going to happen so we would be best served looking into Ben Sheets. Make sure his shoulder passes a physical and you are getting yourself a workhorse on the mound and a competitor to boot. Think John Lackey with a few more MPH on his fastball and a heavier sinker. Sounds good to me!

There needs to be personnel changes, some will be difficult to do because as fans we have an affinity for the fan favorites (hasta la lluego Mike Lowell), but what everyone seems to forget is that this is STILL a business and when there is dead weight, it needs to be cut for the business to prosper. I love what Mike Lowell brings and brought to Boston, I commend him for taking a "hometown discount" when he could have gotten more money and more years with the Phillies, but his range has depreciated so much so that it's a liability for a team that NEEDS to improve its defense.

Stay Tuned

Ryan

One More Gem

Can anyone dream up a better situation than Pedro Martinez trying to stave off elimination for one more day and add one more chapter to the Legacy that is Pedro Martinez: Shredding the Steroid Era One Curveball at a Time. (That shit is trademarked, don't steal it.) Pedey (The Real Pedey, Sorry Dustin) is putting all of Red Sox Nation on his back in order to throw a massive Cock Block in the direction of the Steinbrenner Front Office. I'll be honest with you; I don't know what Pedro has left. I don't know if the tank is on 'E' of if he just gassed up and is ready for another epic. What I do know is that he is one of the best "pitchers'" in baseball history and he's got enough guts and guile for one last hurrah, sort of like the killer in horror movies that is seemingly dead but wakes up for one last scare. Tonight is Pedro's last scare, and I'm certainly ready for one final brutal slaughtering of the Evil Empire!

As good as Alex Rodriguez is, tonight is going to define his postseason, not everything he has done to this point. Tonight his team has some pressure thrust back upon them as they return home to not let the Fightin' Phils force a Game 7. He is facing someone whom he has a .291 lifetime career batting average against and for the first REAL time this post season other than Game 1 (which he coincidentally went 0-4) has pressure aplenty upon him to succeed. I'm a firm believe that when he isn't facing Little Leaguers out there on the bump in the postseason that he is going to fall like London Bridge. What say you, Alexander?

When is Ryan Howard going to decide that he may be needed in order for the Phillies to REALLY be able to win this thing? As good as Chase Utley has been, tying Reggie Jackson's long-standing record, Howard has been that abysmal. 12 strikeouts in 5 games speak for itself to the magnitude of suck (check career notes) that he has been doling out on baseball's biggest stage. He has had trouble with lefties all season (.207 BA in 222 AB's) but he needs to find away to be a force, even if it's getting on base for Jayson Werth hitting behind him. He is the key to this game for the Phillies, even more important than Pedro for me. If Howard hits, the Phillies will win.

Andy Pettite is in my book a Hall of Famer, steroids and all. He is one of the best big game pitchers of my lifetime not to mention a VERY good regular season pitcher as well (229 Wins). But he's working on 3 days' rest. He has not thrown on three days' rest all season and hasn't in over 2 seasons. That's a red flag. Had he of done it EVEN ONCE this year, I'd give the advantage to him over a fully rested Pedro, but tonight I'm seeing flat cutters coming Ryan Howard's way, setting up a Yaya-Ball that may actually tickle the ghost of Babe Ruth on its way down.

The alpha question of tonight's game is this: If the Phillies have a lead, who closes the friggin' thing out? Manuel has gone to a duopoly in the closer role, and I'm not sure that I have much faith in either player. Lidge had a horrible season, to say the least but in the playoffs he hasn't been bad. He entered the game in Game 4 in a NON-SAVE situation. This sounds like a cop-out but it is a completely different animal. He dispatched of the first two batters of the inning and then made a mistake pitch to Damon and all hell broke Loose. Madsen was anything but a sure thing in his 9^th inning Palsy-inducing finish. But I am going to go with Lidge hoping he will channel his 2008 self for one more game and hope for a blow out in Game 7.

Pedro is a Bostonian through and through and I personally don't think that Pedro is capable of not going out on top. Is 7 innings 1 Earned Run too much to ask for. Probably. But the stage is set, the book is open. Put the pen to paper and your finger on the seams Pedey, your Legacy needs a conclusion and it starts at 7:57.

Stay Tuned

Ryan

The Chase is Ut-ter-ley Intriguing

Cue "Gonna Fly Now" Inspriational Music: *Trumpets* Da Da Danana Danana Danana

Maybe when I wrote one of my previous posts, I forgot about one of the more phenomenal feats in World Series History. But with Chase Utley hitting his 5^th homerun and oh so coyly placing his name beside the likes of Reggie Jackson in the World Series record books, we truly are watching one of the most exciting players in baseball history, whose only comparable 2^nd baseman in baseball history in terms of OPS is Rogers Hornsby. Rogers F-ing Hornsby. Philadelphia needs a new hero, and since the aforementioned 'Rocky' reference (although still my favorite movie) is beginning to be outdated, and with Ryan Howard doing his best Jason Varitek impression, Chase Utley is ready to step up and play the role of Dominatrix for his bitch; the Yankees. Safety Word for the Bombers is: Steinbrenner.

Da Da Danana Danana Danana

If AJ Burnett wasn't already the head case that we thought he was, the Yankees better have their 80 million dollar man on suicide watch after "letting down 25 guys and an entire city." I'm not one to make fun of someone, oh, who am I kidding, Sack the F*ck Up. Face it, you lost, you not only lost but sucked hind tit while you did it. You didn't throw many pitches so odds are you're going to throw again sometime in Game 7 if the game goes into extras.

Da Da Dadada Dada Dada

What else can you say about Cliff Lee? The guy is a bulldog and he is going to be living the dream, this offseason when he gets a fat ass check. He was brilliant through 7. The only reason he came out in the 8^th is because the Phillies bullpen is a Byun Hyun Kim implosion waiting to happen for every out they have to be on the mound. He didn't have his dominant no-hit stuff but he was MORE than up to the task at flogging that Yankee Lineup. If the Phillies can get to a Game 7, he will play the role of Randy Johnson in the 2001 World Series, coming in the later innings to shut down the Yankmees.

Da Da Dadadada…..

Thus far in the series, I will admit that I was wrong with the Girardi/Manuel comparison. But if Andy Pettite loses on 3 days rest after AJ SliceMyWrists flopped horribly on 3 days rest, Girardi is not only going to be second guessed but abhorred by all of the Empire's fanbase (that's ok by me by the way.) CC is the only one that is able to throw on the reduced respite and I'm not sure if you remember all the consecutive 3 day rest starts for CC by the Brewers last year, but it didn't end well in his final start. If it gets to Game 7, I'm just sayin, the Yanks could be in for a Burnett-esque performance.

Gonna Fly Now

Like Rocky (the Phillies) facing Ivan Drago (steroid infused Yankees) they are facing an uphill climb through the Ural Mountains. And yes, that was another Rocky reference and yes I know WAYYY too much about the Rocky Anthology. But I'm inclined to choose an aging Pedro in Game 6 on normal rest than an aging Andy Pettite on short rest. Does it get more exciting than Pedro Martinez up against the most inclement almost insurmountable odds, and beating them away with a 2-seamer? I'm pretty sure it doesn't. Pedro is THE greatest pitcher that I've seen in my lifetime and I want one more moment, one more game to cement his legacy in my mind. Give me 7 strong and no earned runs Pedey, Please! Let's go Phillies, you're not called the Fightin' Phils, for nothin'!

Stay Tuned

Ryan

 

The Unfathomable is Inching Nearer

Now I know that I have proclaimed that Joe Girardi is the worst Manager in baseball, but if Charlie Manuel channels Girardi with a side helping of Grady Little anymore, he may take the cake. There were a FEW glaring issues I had with Sunday's Game 4.

1. The Who is Joe Blanton Issue: Let's start by saying that Blanton wasn't horrible. That being said what the f*ck is he pitching for? You have a guy that CLEARLY out-pitched the Yankee Ace in Game 1 in Cliff "I Own A-Rod's nuts" Lee, and with both pitchers going on 3 days rest they should both be on an even playing field regardless of innings pitched in Game 1. This would also set up for BOTH Aces on full rest for a potential Game 7. Reporters even went as far to say, "If Lee demanded to start would you have even put take it into consideration?" "No, Why would I." Are you f'n kidding me? Managing Fail.
   
2. The JA Happ Misuse: Why is JA Happ not pitching? Even though Cole Hamels had a mini implosion in Game 3 for the first 4 2/3 innings he baffled, no more than baffled, stifled, no more than stifled, owned the Yankees, because as I've professed, the lefties would give the Yankees problems this series. Happ is a lefty that SHOULD be playing a MUCH more than he has to neutralize the Yankees' switch hitters, and he has yet to be thrown in to the fire. Managing Fail.
   
3. The Alex Rodriguez conundrum: Why in the flying Christ is Alex Rodriguez even given the CHANCE to win the game when he has had a for the most part an epic post season run? He shouldn't. There were runners on 1^st and 3^rd, which means there is still a base open, SECOND. Put him on and deal with Posada. I don't care if Rodriguez has a tendency to swing at sliders in the dirt. Lidge isn't going to throw that pitch because he now has a runner on third base and has made it a habit of doing that all season. Then Lidge throws two cock shots down the middle and there's your ballgame. Managing Fail.
   

I clearly am NOT the manager of a Major League Baseball team, but that is rudimentary baseball. If your best is available you use them. You don't let the opposition's best player beat you if you don't have to. Serious issue with the way he's managed the last couple games.

With the plunking of Alex Rodriguez, I was looking back at the other hit by pitches, to look for intent. I didn't see it. That being said, I'd be a bit miffed also, if I'd gotten plunked 3x in a game and an inning, by the same team. But for the umpires to issue warnings before the CC has a chance to get out on the mound is really Busch League. They OBVIOUSLY know the situation, but they HAVE to assume that there isn't intent especially in the middle of a BIG first inning rally by the Bombers. I fully expect AJ to plunk someone tonight barring another guffaw by the umps tonight in the top of the first. Anyone else think Utley goes up with someone from the Iggles' rib pads on?

Johnny Damon. Call him what you want, but that was THE BEST base running play I've EVER seen, and that's after hours on debating about Roberts' steal of second base. After his slide into second to have the presence of mind to look at third base with the third baseman covering second due to the shift on Mark Teixeira is genius. That is an utterly horrible display of heads up baseball by the Phillies catcher Carlos Ruiz, because IMMEDIATELY after he throws that ball, he has to break for third. It's not the pitcher's bag, it's the catcher. Especially knowing you have a massive headcase on the mound in Brad "Pujols ate my babies" Lidge, Ruiz has to get to third. Piss Poor if you ask me.

Cliff Lee goes tonight, and does anyone else think a perfect game is out of the realm of possibility? This guys a stud, but if I'm the Yanks, do I want to really go back to NY and have another hoopla-fused game with Pedro on the mound followed by a potential Game 7? I don't. Yanks need to close this out because I'm not sure that Pettite vs. Pedro is the answer. And ANYTHING goes in Game 7, right Kevin Millar?

Stay Tuned

Ryan